Just a couple of messages that K6X sent to me for issue 45. I thought you would all like to see the sort of thing that I like to receive. These messages were personal. However, Paul has given permission for me to publish them, just to show you all the sort of thing an 8BS editor has to handle. ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, To: 2J3 From: K6X ((Cluke)) Subject: Dear Uncle Chris, Those nice men in the white coats,you know, the ones that dole out the funny -shaped Smarties ( I love the little white ones that make me keep falling over ) each morning after we've had our cold shower and our run around the grounds? Not the ones that have the funny accents and the gold American Excess cards and say "NINE" when you ask if the boxing gloves could PLEASE be left off tonight when we all get locked in our cots after supper, the other ones, right? Well, they let me have my crayons back. Wouldn't let me sharpen them for some reason or other, but at least I've got them, well most of them. Nigel ate a few whilst I was sitting on the potty! I couldn't get up to stop him cos I was waiting for Howard to finish tearing up the news- paper. All I wanted was a few small squares but Howard, as usual, gets carried away and before you know it there's joined-up people and doilies everywhere. Anyway, by the time I'd managed to persuade Howard that this wasn't another audition for Zocko's Children's Entertainment Agency, and could I pretty please have a few bits of paper to make some aeroplanes with ( he is SO gullible! ), got me socks wrung out, cos as soon as I stood up old Alf who thinks he's really a gold prospector was in there slopping the contents all over the floor before I could move out the way, and I HATE squelchy socks, anyway, by the time I got back to my cot after that lot, I found Nigel sitting there grinning a multi-coloured smile at me. It came as a bit of a surprise actually cos as far as I remember Nigel had his teeth confiscated after that time he stuck them onto the Queen's picture. The one above the desk where the Head nurse sits, at least I've been told she's the Head nurse cos she's got dirty knees, but I don't understand the connection. Where was I? Oh yes, Nigel and his smile. You've guessed it. They weren't his teeth, they were my crayons. Not stuck on the Queen's picture, that was ages ago. No, in his mouth. Not the Queen's, NIGEL's. DO pay attention when I'm talking. They couldn't be stuck in the Queen's mouth cos I've only just got them back, and the Queen's picture got taken down a while ago after someone wrote " We'll never forget you Freddy " on it. Seems they thought it was a picture of some bloke who died while he was on an aid programme or something. We didn't see the programme cos the telly got taken away recently due to all the rows we had about whether to watch the new ITV channel or stick with the BBC. Having the choice of two channels was a real headache for some. I am good at making decisions, well sometimes maybe I'm not really that good, although perhaps I'm not so sure about that, but anyway having two channels to choose from was too much for the others, and the men in white coats who say " NINE " said that they were having to give out too many Smarties, so the telly got taken away. Anyway, I managed to get most of my crayons back out of Nigel's mouth, getting a few nasty sucks in the process, and ended up with enough of them, the crayons not the sucks, to do some pictures for you. I hope you like them. They are not very well coloured in cos most of the crayons were blunt, except the ones that Nigel had gnawed at, and it is awkward trying to hold them with boxing gloves on AND hold the torch steady at the same time. I'd better stop now cos I can hear someone coming. The Head nurse probably, doing the rounds. If you like the pictures, please send in some more crayons ( cut the points off first or they won't let me have them ) and some drawing paper ( the softer the better ) and I will do some more if I find the time. Lots of love to Auntie Gill. Paulie. XXX ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, To: 2J3 From: K6X ((Cluke)) Subject: Woss all this then? That wos one tatty ole disc wot you sent me with issue 44 on it! Have I said or done something ( more than usual ) to upset you? More labels on it than a kid starting school! The only thing missing was the idiot gloves threaded through the sleeve! A slow peel of the label ( I like a bit of a challenge ) revealed that before it had Signwriter on it, whatever that is, it had Revs. TUT! TUT! Piracy yet! I s'pose you got it as part of a job lot at a boot sale? Likely story!! The Cumana Disc Drive Guide that you sent didn't contain the hoped-for cct. diagram, so a quick ( well, relatively quick, you know me! ) phonecall to Cumana got me the info as to what volts lurk where, so I'll crank up the ole sodding iron and set about getting the plug ( for which ta ever so ) put onto a lead so's I can try to blow up the M128 by running the twin off it. The guy in the Tech Dept @ Cumana said that they had moved last year, and needing the space, had just dumped (!) all the old manuals and stuff for the older machines. What a waste!? Phoned Acorn User, all naive like, to ask if they would be doing a Show next year. The Editor Fella phoned me back and with much effort, cos he don't say much, I got some info out of him. I felt like one of the Watergate pair, trying to get the answers to some of my questions. I reckon even Parkinson would baulk at interviewing him! Any- how, the following may or may not be news to you. He feels that all that CAN be said about the Beeb etc. has BEEN said over the past years, so AU ( as Beebug ) will be devoting future energies towards The Archers and it's offspring, from which I infer that AU has or will soon cease support for the Beeb etc. Last year's AU Show barely broke even, and this year's didn't do even THAT well, so next year's is looking unlikely, although it WILL be at Harrogate if it does take place. (You'd better tell JGH to make a start on clearing out the garage, and also finding the best pubs within staggering distance of his gaff, cos it looks like he's gonna be taken up on his offer. ) The Editor Fella did say that the Acorn World Show would be on at Wembley, but I don't think I'll be going cos it's aimed at The Archers rather than us. No doubt in 15 years there will be groups of old Archie owners out in the wilderness grumbling about lack of support, as Acorn User concentrates on getting to grips with the new Acorn Certain ( ie no-RISC ) A21000 Solar-powered sub-micro. There will be Hints & Tips on how to use the hand-held combined scanner/printer,*FX Calls not in the 9-volume User Guide, how to avoid losing the A21000 through the hole in your trouser pocket, and how to dismantle your Hoover if it should get sucked up off the floor, how to fold up the LCD screen so that it will fit back into an old-fashioned 5 1/4" disc-box, and how to save time when inflating the membrane keyboard by using a Sparklett's Sodastream! Remember, you read it here first! ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, To: 2J3 From: K6X ((Cluke)) Subject: Mixed feelings .. Very surprised to find your letter on the doormat. First off had me thinking I'd lost a couple of weeks somewhere, but a quick look at the Daily Liar was enough to convince me that I was still in real time ( well, it's all relative isn't it? ) and that I still had a couple of weeks to hone the point on the ole blue pencil, as well as read a few hundred more pages of the Oxford Dictionary. You ought to try it, it is quite amazing some of the words in it, some even I have never heard of! I am reading it partly as a bedtime soporific, and partly cos I feel that my position as chief spellign-checker is being threatened by a piece of software in a computer, and there is NO WAY that I will be beaten by a machine! Got THAT off me chest. You obviously took no notice of my previous letter on this disc, cos the disc wot I just got has got just as Lookee, a ^ palindromic phrase ^!!! many labels and gobbets of sticky stuff on it as the previous one. I don't want any excuses about you not having received the previous letter cos it is on this disc, that is REALLY a specious argument! I can take a hint though, so I have sent you a few nice formatted and verified DFS and ADFS discs for future use. The mixed feelings of the title relate to the disc wot you sent, excitement at reading your note that you had made some changes to the way that it was to run; I thought that you had managed to incorporate the changes we had discussed about staying within a menu option when getting out of a file within that menu rather than returning to the main menu each time. Therefore the other feeling was disappointment when I ran the disc and found that this was not what you had done. I am not clear why you have made this change from break to space, unless it is a stage along the way to other changes that you have up your sleeve? It DOES all work though, which is what you wanted me to check out ( at least, it does on my M128 ). A few (useful?) observations if I may? I DID look at EVERY file, and some did not have "Press Space" at the end. With a change in the way the system runs, the readership will need constant reminding for the first few years until we get the hang of it! Maybe a few lines in About This Issue, to draw people's attention to the change, and a few more in the Editorial or somewhere to reinforce the point and explain why you have done it? I'm sure we'd all like to know! It does seem to return to the main menu a tad quicker, but that may just be my imagination as I have been spending the last few nights going through all the TAU discs and ending up back at the main option menu so often when I come out of the programs. No doubt you have already considered including summat as to the whys and wherefores of the change but I thought I would mention it as being "A Good Idea" just in case you were vacillating. I think the REAL reason is that you now have so much 8BS stuff cluttering up No. 17 that Gill was demanding more space, and this was your ( rather facetious if I may say so ) reply! The Twin-drive is now being powered by the M128 and (so far) has not thrown a wobbly. Maybe I ought to stick to delving into the hard- rather than the software as I seem to have more success with that? ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, To: 2J3 From: K6X ((Cluke)) Subject: Schooldaze .. Nearly got me 40T discs sorted out for the school. I thought I had finished them, until I got BBC-159 and found a few more that were at the sort of level I was aiming at. Trouble is, I can't lift them off of BBC-159! I keep running into bits of machine code that I think are part of the main menu. I am probably doing summat wrong or not doing summat I should be, as usual, but this knowledge is notalota help! Destruction book time again! ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, PRESS SPACE